Howards’ Way – Series One, Episode Seven

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Polly tells Jan the truth about her sham marriage to Gerald – Abby isn’t his child and his numerous affairs aren’t conducted with women.  It’s something of a storytelling weakness that best-friends Polly and Jan have never discussed this before, but it does make dramatic sense for the viewers to learn about it at the same time that Jan does.  These revelations help to chip away at Polly’s self confidence, giving us a glimpse of a lonely person lurking underneath her bravura exterior.

As regards character interactions, something similar happens when Lynne finally realises that Phil is a male chauvinist pig who only wants her for her body and would never have considered her as crew for his FastNet team because, well, she’s just a woman.  Both have lived in Tarrant for some time, so it stretches credibility that she wouldn’t have realised exactly how he operates by now (and lets be honest, the viewers probably twigged some ten seconds after he first appeared).  Leo sums him up perfectly.  “Self satisfied berk.”

One of my favourite comedy moments occurs with Jack and Kate.  Jack’s two days into his month long pledge of sobriety (he’s got a fifty pound bet with her) but is clearly weakening.  A his hand slowly stretches towards a bottle, the phone rings.  He picks up the receiver – it’s Kate.  Shamefacedly he then hides the bottle behind his back!  It’s a lovely bit of business, which is developed further when Kate tells him that even over the phone she’ll be able to tell if he was lying about his drinking.

One technical observation is that the difference between the film exteriors and videotape interiors is glaringly obvious, mainly because of the weather.  For example, Tom calls on Avril (on film) and it’s a gloomy day but once they enter her living room (on videotape) the sun is streaming through the windows.  Normally, the film element of the episode would have been done first – if this was the case, I wonder why they didn’t attempt to replicate the weather a little more accurately?  If they’d shot the studio scenes first, then fair enough – nothing could be done – but if it was the other way around then it’s something of a missed opportunity.

The main interest in this episode though is the introduction of Charles Frere.  When we first meet him he’s nattily dressed in a tuxedo, like a cut-price James Bond.  He bumps into Polly and views Jan, from a distance, with interest – but he’s really in Tarrant to speak to Avril.  Yes, Charles is the mystery man who broke Avril’s heart and now he’s back.

He’s only interested in business, or so he says, but the mere sight of him is enough to send Avril into mild hysterics.  So when Tom later calls at her cottage and finds her in a distressed state, the inevitable happens ….

They both comfort each other and as the credits roll it’s fairly obvious what’s going to happen next.  Indeed, the only surprise is that it’s taken them seven episodes to make a move on each other.

Jan and Ken have yet to advance beyond their professional relationship (despite what a poison-pen letter delivered to Tom might say).  Although Ken doesn’t have a great deal to do in this episode, his character is nicely developed – although it happens when he’s off-screen.  Jan and Lynne discuss him, with Jan nailing him as something of a social climber – he may have money, but he really wants to be accepted amongst the upper classes.  But his barrow-boy persona seems doomed to ensure he’ll always be an outsider.

Howards’ Way – Series One, Episode Eight

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This one opens with Charles steering his yacht en route to a business meeting with Ken.  Size, of course, isn’t everything, but it’s fair to say that Charles’ craft dwarfs most of the others in the marina.   His yacht serves several purposes – not only does it tell us that he’s a man of substance but it’s also a handy device to impress others.

And Ken is very impressed.  Dressed in a gleaming all-white outfit, he’s obviously a little overawed.  A breakfast meeting with champagne?  It’s a small taste of the high life that he’s incredibly anxious to sample more regularly (and no doubt Charles would have been well aware of this, so the location would have been no accident).  Charles suggests a joint venture – Ken builds the new marina, Charles runs it.  Ken asks for time to consider, but still seems confident that if he refuses then Charles will be stuck – since Ken owns a prime piece of property bang in the middle of the proposed location.

Charles isn’t bothered though, in true Thatcherite spirit he declares that “we live in a commercial world, Ken. Everything’s for sale.”

Time has clearly passed off-screen, as Jan and Ken are practically ready to open the boutique, whilst Tom’s prototype boat has passed its tests with flying colours.  We saw a brief moment of testing in the previous episode, but Tom’s boat has still sailed off the drawing board with unseemly haste.

As for Jan, she’s suddenly turned into a hard-headed businesswoman, easily able to gain very favourable terms from tailor Bernie Rosen (Harry Landis).  Bernie’s Jewish of course (this scores a full ten on the cliché ratometer).

Tom’s delighted to hear that his prototype is developing well and, in a moment of sheer joy, embraces Avril in the office.  Alas, Leo walks in at precisely that moment and if looks could kill no doubt both his father and Avril would have disintegrated on the spot.  I’m not sure whether Leo’s more annoyed that his father’s in the arms of anther woman of if he’s simply miffed not to be the one enjoying the embrace!  Edward Highmore continues to essay a performance which is low on subtlety, but perhaps that suits Leo’s character.  Whereas most of the other characters are capable of hiding their true feelings from time to time, Leo is very much a WYSIWYG type.

Leo tracks Abby down in Southampton, which is the cue for another burst of Abby’s theme (the plaintive guitar melody which, along with the theme, must be the most familiar part of the incidentals) and a somewhat surprising revelation – she’s pregnant.  Charles formally meets Jan for the first time, Lynne is offered a place in an all-women crew in the FastNet, whilst the other main point of interest concerns the continuing travails at the yard.

With the loss of the German contract, the bank are ready to foreclose but Tom is able to persuade them that his prototype will turn their fortunes around (but he needs Jan to agree to use their house as collateral).  Jack is still insistent that plastic toy boats have no place in his yard, but is shocked and stunned to realise that he no longer owns fifty percent of the company (and therefore is unable exercise a casting vote).  Tom has 25%, Avril had 25% but then bought an additional 5%, so she and Tom are able to outvote Jack.  The look on Glyn Owen’s face is priceless.  Presumably Jack must have been pretty drink-addled in recent months not to realise that Avril’s increased her shareholding.

Jack later articulates his feelings to Kate.  “I’ve fought for that yard, Kate. Lost sleep, sweated blood for it. And what’s it all been in aid of? Nothing. Everything I’ve specialised in over the years is gone.”  In her own way, Kate is as much of a traditionalist as Jack is – but she can see that everything has to change, nothing can stay the same forever.

Later Charles plays Avril another visit.  She’s still not interest in his proposals, this time he tells her he’s interested in buying the yard.  Whilst he claims he’s prepared to do it in order to help her father, she’s far from convinced.  “The only person you’re willing to help is yourself”.  This helps to ramp up the tension surrounding the Mermaid (plus Charles’ recent arrival also continues to shake things up nicely).

Howards’ Way – Series One, Episode Ten

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Tom and Avril have spent the night together aboard the Flying Fish.  For all that Jan’s been shrill and accusatory this year, it’s Tom who turns out to be the one who irreparably destroys their marriage.  Pledging all their money (including using the house as collateral) for his dreams of boat building started the cracks but when it’s revealed that he’s been conducting an affair with Avril there’s no way back.

As Tom and Avril lie in each others arms in dawn’s early light, a young chap is making his way over to another boat.  Presumably he must be a little hard of hearing as he doesn’t seem to notice the red beeping danger signal on the dashboard.  He attempts to turn the ignition switch and whoosh, there’s a rather large explosion.

Tom plays the hero and rescues the boy but it means that neither Tom or Avril have time to return home before Leo’s up and about.  And Leo can’t help but notice that neither his father or Avril seem to have spent the night in their respective beds (he’s still doing a spot of paining and decorating at Avril’s).  Quite how he worked out that Avril wasn’t in her bed isn’t explained ….

There’s also a journalist sniffing about and he speaks to both Leo and Ken.  You can just imagine Ken’s delight when he learns that Tom and Avril spent the night together, whilst Leo is understandably perplexed and troubled.  With immaculate timing, matters come to a head just as Lynne returns home in triumph (her boat won their class in the FastNet).

Ken, of course, is on hand to stoke up the fire.  Meeting Jan off the train from London, he can’t wait to tell her the news whilst elsewhere Leo confronts Avril.  “You may have all the looks, Avril, but that’s all you’ve got. Any woman who goes after a man knowing he’s got a wife and family is damn well nothing.”  Edward Highmore doesn’t quite spark into life, but maybe he’s a little less wooden than usual.

Jan confronts Tom who tells her that it could have easily have been her with Ken.  This is an astonishing statement as there’s been no evidence – the odd tango apart – to suggest that Jan’s even considered breaking her vows.

Perhaps it would have worked a little better had this storyline dripped out over a few episodes, with the rumours about Tom and Avril slowly gaining momentum.  As it is, it feels rather rushed.

If you need a little light relief from the strife at the Howards, then Jack’s still ensconced at the clinic, playing gin rummy with Kate and reluctant to join in any group therapy.  Fair to say he’s not the easiest patient.  Jack finally makes an appearance at group therapy, although he doesn’t take it terribly seriously (“I don’t drink a lot, I spill most of it”) leaving the therapist – Louise Silverton (Christine Kavanagh) – mildly irritated.

Elsewhere, Ken and Charles have a business lunch at the yacht club.  Lynne waits upon them and is introduced to Charles for the first time.  Once again there’s the wonderful contrast between Ken – anxious to appear cultured and intelligent – and Charles – who breezes through any social or business occasion with ease.  The business of the wine is a good example.  Ken suggests a bottle of Mouton Cadet but Charles wonders if the Chateau Montrose might not be preferable.  It’s a subtle example of one-upmanship which sees Charles emerge victorious yet again.

But Ken’s convinced that he’s won the war, telling Jan later that he’s got Charles “just where I want him. If he doesn’t go along with me, there’s nowhere else to go.”.  I’ve got a feeling that Ken’s counting his chickens rather too early.

After spying Lynne for the first time, Charles clearly likes what he sees, so he sends her hand-picked flowers and arranges a dinner-date with her aboard his yacht at 8:30.  He’s a smooth operator, that’s for sure.

We finally learn that Shellet is Jack’s brother-in-law.  When Jack receives a letter from him, he’s perplexed.  Kate can’t understand why, after all it seems perfectly natural that he should want to get in touch.  Jack has the perfect riposte.  “He’s been dead twenty five years, that’s what’s wrong.”

And now he’s made a claim for ownership of the Mermaid Yard.  But the end of episode twist (Charles is the one who’s put him up to it) is a great moment which adds yet another layer to the plot.  Ten episodes in and everything’s ticking along nicely.

Howards’ Way – Series One, Episode Eleven

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Shellet comes calling on the Urqhuarts.  Polly doesn’t exactly take to him, telling Gerald that “there’s a sort of person” to see him.  Shellet needs money for expenses and he also seems deprived in other areas (mentioning to Polly that it gets very lonely when he’s all alone in his hotel room).  Polly might have an eye for just about anything in trousers, but I’ve a feeling that Shellet is a bridge too far, even for her.

Lynne’s glammed up for her evening meal with Charles whilst Ken calls on Jan.  He plainly feels threatened by Claude (or “that froggy dressmaker” as he calls him) and seems to be fretting about the business trip to Cannes that Jan and Claude will shortly be taking.  Far away from home, he no doubt envisages that Claude will take advantage of her in just the sort of way he’s not been able to do so far!

It’s a sunny day in Tarrant, something of a rarity.  This makes Charles and Lynne’s champagne and caviar seem even more intoxicating.  He learns that Lynne’s father is conducting an affair with Avril (uh oh) and then outlines his philosophy of living, which revolves around power and freedom.  “Power to act and freedom to choose.” They’ve hardly finished the meal when he casually mentions that he’d like to sleep with her – which is as good an example of power and freedom as you can get.

Abby decides she wants to keep the baby.  This seems to have cheered her up – for pretty much the first time ever she seems almost happy.

And then we go to Cannes, well sort of.  In later years the budget would actually stretch to foreign filming, but that wasn’t the case here.  So we have a brief montage of stock footage (people lounging on the beach, etc) before cutting to a pool obviously somewhere in England.  But they made a bit of an effort to suggest exotic climes by having two topless women walk past Claude and Jan’s table in a casual manner.  That was a tad unexpected I have to say, especially considering that the episode originally went out just before 8.00 pm on a Sunday evening.

Ken might be right to be wary of Claude, but at present it’s her business acumen he wants (Claude’s attempting to woo her away from Ken – suggesting instead that they set up business together).  I’m afraid his silly French accent is beginning to get on my nerves ….

And then Ken pops up in Cannes, casually offering to take Jan out to dinner.  And of course being Ken he appears at her hotel door with a rose in his teeth and a bottle of champagne in his hand.  After a decent meal (off-screen, which saved a bit more money) they return to Jan’s hotel room and you can probably guess what happened next.

When they meet up for breakfast the next morning, Ken demonstrates that he’s an unreconstructed Englishman abroad since he’s not willing to try any funny food (bacon and eggs is what he wants).  The arrival of Claude sets Ken’s antenna twitching, but he acts casually in only the way that Ken Masters can.

The highly recognisable Hubert Rees pops up as racehorse trainer Stephen Bettins.  Kate’s part of a racehorse syndicate (each owning a leg) but it seems clear that she’s going to struggle to pay her share.  It might have been these scenes which inspired Glaister to later develop Trainer, which unfortunately wasn’t the same sort of success that both The Brothers and Howards’ Way had been.

Polly’s made it quite plain to Abby (before she ran away from home of course) that she viewed her daughter as an extreme disappointment.  But not any more.  After opening her mail(!), Polly’s delighted to read a letter from an American student called Orin Hudson.  He and Abby were obviously close for a while (as Polly so charmingly puts it – “God knows what this boy sees in Abby but it all sounds very lovey-dovey”).  And since he’s a member of an incredibly wealthy American family, Polly sees it as her duty to reunite the two lovebirds.  This is mercenary Polly at her best.

Jack’s solicitor lays on the line exactly how serious things are.  If Shellet’s claim is successful then not only will Jack lose the yard, he’ll also forfeit his house.  Tom will lose everything too, as all the yard’s assets (including the new boat) will be Shellet’s.  That’s a suitably dramatic way to bring the episode to an end.

 

Howards’ Way – Series One, Episode Twelve

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Charles – a vision in white – is out for an early morning jog.  By the way that Tony Anholt labours his way across the marina, I’d guess he wasn’t a regular jogger in real life.  Once he’s puffed his way back to the yacht, Charles tells Lynne that he’s keen to spend the day with her – the fact she’s agreed to help her mother (it’s the grand opening of the boutique) doesn’t bother him.

If it hasn’t already been made obvious then here it’s explicit – Charles expects his own wants and needs to come first.  It’s what’s made him a successful businessman, although with one (failed?) marriage, the floundering relationship with Avril and (as we’ll soon see) the odd illegitimate child lurking about, possibly his controlling nature is the reason why his personal life is chaotic.

Shellet is also looking for female company.  His mild overture to Polly came to nothing (whilst the mind boggles at the pair of them together, a house-sharing comedy with Shellet as Polly and Gerald’s lodger would have been fab.  That’s one spin-off show we were sadly denied).  Anyway, he’s seeking solace elsewhere – eyeing the escort adverts in the local paper.  He doesn’t seem interested in either Adam and Eve Escorts or Madame’s Escort Agency, instead he circles the Pussy Cats advert.  I don’t know why, but this is a little detail that’s always amused.  We then have further evidence of Shellet’s uncouth and unstable nature – he slops his tea in his saucer.  Mind you, the strong hint later on that his relationship with his sister (Jack’s late wife) crossed familial bounds puts his tea slopping crime into perspective.

Avril and Tom are at Napier Marine, hopeful that the board will invest in Tom’s boat.  They can count on some support, but David Lloyd (Bruce Bould) is the one they really need to convince.  Bould was best known for playing the fawning David Harris-Jones (“great, super”) in The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin.  It’s very hard not to think of Harris-Jones whenever Lloyd’s on the screen – the fact that we meet him in a boardroom environment doesn’t help.

Avril’s in her element dealing with the board, which makes it plain that she’s somewhat wasted at the Mermaid, just trying to make the books balance.  Clearly the programme-makers thought so too, as in later years she’s shunted over to Relton Marine, where she became a high-flying executive.

Ken’s pushing to be an equal partner with Charles in the Marina development.  Will Ken really be able to raise the capital needed?  Time will tell, but at the moment all seems rosy.  I like the way that when Ken extends his arm for a handshake to seal the deal, Charles imperceptivity pauses, looks down at Ken’s hand, looks up again with the faintest ghost of a smile and only then shakes.  It’s subtle, but reiterates that Charles is still the dominant force.

Having packed in his job at the garage, Leo is looking for alternative employment.  He wants to change the world, but first is considering a factory job on the Isle of Wight.  Abby’s bump has expanded greatly (and she’s still happy, which is slightly unnerving).

Jack finally tells Avril about Shellet’s claim on the yard, which spells trouble for Tom’s boat (the Barracuda).  The scene is also notable for showing a rare reflective side to Jack.  Possibly it’s because he’s worried he’s going to lose everything, but there appears to be genuine regret from him about his disastrous marriage.  “She never forgave me for the way I treated her. I could see it in her eyes the night she died.  Sometimes I do feel guilty. I can’t help it. I can’t change the past, can I? God knows, sometimes I wish I could.”  Glyn Owen is often called upon to act as comic relief, but occasionally – as here – he gets an opportunity to play something a little deeper.

Jan doesn’t approve of Lynne’s relationship with Charles.  Mind you, as Lynne says, Jan can hardly talk – Ken Masters is surely nobody’s vision of a perfect partner.  There’s another classic Ken moment in this episode – he pops Sade on the hi-fi and, all by himself, smooches around the room.

Orin’s sent Abby another letter which, in her continuing absence, Polly unashamedly opens and reads.  Amusingly, Gerald initially registers irritation at Polly’s violation of their daughter’s secrecy, but a moment later can’t help but ask her what’s in it!

Polly agrees with Gerald that she’ll forward the letter on (although he doesn’t catch that she adds the word “personally”).  Thanks to the efforts of a private detective, Polly’s tracked her daughter down.  It’s not exactly a joyful reunion, since their brief squabble is followed by Abby falling down the stairs ….

Howards’ Way – Series One, Episode Thirteen

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For the first time we see Polly shaken out of her usual amused self-control.  The sight of Abby being carted off in an ambulance is more than enough to finally bring her long-repressed maternal feelings to the surface.

They aren’t reciprocated though, as Abby screams when her mother attempts to join her in the ambulance.  And Leo offers no comfort either – looking blankly at Polly when she insists that Abby’s tumble down the stairs was an accident.  Since it clearly was (there’s not even a hint that she was pushed) why does Leo seems incapable of offering even a crumb of comfort?

The baby – a boy – is born, although Abby still refuses to have anything to do with her mother.  This results in a tear-streaked Polly leaving her daughter’s bedside, convinced that Leo’s the one who’s turned her daughter against her.  “I hold you responsible for this, Leo Howard. And you’ll regret it, I promise you. I’m going to make you pay.”

After a brief moment of self-insight last time, Jack’s back to his normal, bluff persona.  Telling Avril that, in the words of Aristotle, “when the going gets tough, the tough get going” and plonking his shoes into the filing cabinet are two early signs of that.

He later refuses to be kowtowed when David Lloyd and the others visit the yard to inspect the prototype.  Jack’s at his best here, refusing to stand on ceremony and inordinately proud of the craftsmanship of the Mermaid.  The fact that the prototype is made out of wood is something that’s mollified him – it makes him content that although the Barracuda will be mass-produced, at least the original was hand-crafted in wood.

Jan asks Tom for a divorce (which rather oddly happens off screen).  Ken’s delighted to hear this of course, although he has to ratchet down his joy when he realises that Jan’s more than a little traumatised.  Bless Ken, his social skills tend to be somewhat limited.

Sir John invites Ken to lunch at the golf club.  Once again there’s some lovely class-based comedy – Ken orders a gin and tonic (no doubt seeing it as the perfect drink for such an exclusive environment) whilst Sir John asks for a pint.  Once again, this a small moment which illustrates the difference between them – since Ken is anxious to fit in, he attempts to modify his behaviour accordingly whilst Sir John is secure with his place in the world and sees no need to change.

Kate aptly sums Ken up later as “a wolf in wolf’s clothing” and is baffled why her daughter should prefer him over Tom.  Minutes later they meet – briefly – for the first time.  Kate flashes him an incredibly filthy look and refuses his outstretched hand, so they’re plainly not going to be friends anytime soon!

Relationship traumas in the Howard household continue with Lynne.  She’s still besotted with Charles, even though he’s proving to be somewhat elusive (breaking their appointments).   Poor Lynne spends her time moping by the phone and staring into the distance, waiting for him to call.  Charles doesn’t seem at all bothered though.

There’s another example that Charles is a winner – we see him bouncing around the tennis court, playing a range of athletic shots, which eventually ends up with him emerging victorious.

Claude pops up again, much to Ken’s disgust.  Ken does a nice impression of Claude’s accent though!  Claude wants to purchase a fashion house.  Jan’s keen, Ken’s not.

Howards’ Way, like The Brothers, always understood the importance of carrying forward certain plotlines to the next series as well as closing each run of episodes with a strong cliffhanger.  The disputed ownership of the Mermaid Yard is something that’ll be settled early in series two (we see Jack enter the hearing, but aren’t told what happened).

As for the cliffhanger, an increasingly irate Lynne make her way to Charles’ yacht, only to find him in bed with another woman.  He introduces her as “Honey Gardner, my wife” which rather takes the wind out of Lynne’s sails.  She exits, sobbing, and in her haste to get away loses her balance on the jetty and falls into the water.

It might not be the best stunt ever mounted – rather than a simple stumble and fall, the stuntwoman falls to the ground and then seems to deliberately roll over into the water – but no matter, it’s still a strong way to conclude the first series.

Howards’ Way – Series Two, Episode One

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We open with a nice aerial view of the Tarrant marina.  And of course it’s another gloomy day (Tarrant – a place where the sun rarely shines).

Initially it seems that this shot was simply an impressive visual flourish, but it then becomes clear that Charles, in a helicopter, is hovering above the Mermaid Yard.

This is typical Charles Frere.  Most people would be content to lurk in the background in order to keep tabs on their rivals (the Mermaid are celebrating launching the Barracuda) but not Charles, he has to think bigger.

We then switch to the courtroom where the tug of love for ownership of the Mermaid Yard between Jack and Shellet is continuing.  But within a matter of minutes it’s all over as Shellet doesn’t exactly cover himself with glory in the witness box.  It’s a little odd to see this plotline wrapped up with such unseemly haste, although the aftershock rumbles on for a few more episodes.

The big unresolved question from the series one cliffhanger concerns Lynn.  We saw her tumbling into the water after reeling from the shock of finding Charles in bed with his wife.  It’s now the day after and there’s no sign of her, which concerns Jan.  Frankly, given that Lynne was stunned unconcious when she entered the water (and there was no-one about to help her) it’s hard to see how she couldn’t have drowned. Let’s wait and see though …

Jan asks Leo to stop at home in case Lynne calls, but Leo says he can’t – he’s got something important to do.

Ken (nattilly attired in a suit) shows his caring side to Jan, telling her that if they lived together he could share all her problems. When she mentions that she hasn’t heard from Claude for a while he’s not surprised or concerned. “What else can you expect from a Frog?” I love Ken, he’s a source of endless entertainment.

The hunt for Lynne brings Tom and Jan back together, although it’s an uneasy alliance. He’s as concerned as she is, but Tom (with no evidence) believes that the Jan/Ken axis has driven their daughter away. Given Tom’s dalliance with Avril this seems rather unfair. Jan Harvey is called upon to do a good deal of anguished staring into the distance acting during this episode.

We later find out what Leo’s important job was (of course it concerns Abby). Abby and her baby are leaving the hospital and Leo is on hand to play the devoted father. It’s a role he seems perfectly suited for (although since Orrin, the baby’s real father, is due to arrive shortly, it doesn’t look like he’ll be playing it for much longer). Despite being preoccupied, Leo does manage to provide a lead on Lynne, which sends Tom off on a collision course with Charles.

He’s not at his boat, but Charles’ secretary Samantha (Maria Eldridge) is. Samantha probably gets more lines in this one scene than she does in the rest of her appearances put together. Eldridge’s other credits aren’t extensive (a couple of Goodies episodes and a few roles elsewhere, playing challenging parts such as “Girl in Car” and “Girl with Gun”) which is a little surprising as she’s very watchable here.

With Tom not available to take the Barracuda out, Jack steps into the breach. He’s delighted (cue shots of the boat slicing through the waves with the Howards’ Way theme blasting out) whilst Avril’s not at all pleased that Tom’s left them in the lurch. Cue more anguished staring into the distance acting, this time from Susan Gilmore.

The tension concerning Lynne continues to ratchet up, although any eagle-eyed viewer would have spotted that Tracey Childs wasn’t listed in the opening credits – meaning that (unless it was a double-bluff) she wouldn’t be making an appearance. The final lines of the episode (Tom: “The police have just telephoned. They think they’ve found Lynne”) offers up a number of possibilities, although the mood is rather sabotaged by the fact that they dive straight into the end-credits – which this year features the dreaded vocal version of the theme. I’m not a fan …..